Estoy Nueces

I'm doing it again. I'm listening to that show. Ick. It makes me tense. They haven't said anything incredibly stupid, but it is just irritating. So why do I listen? I think I am an anxiety addict. I really do. Otherwise I don't know why I involve myself in so many things that create anxiety.

Speaking of such, I've committed to being back at the cafe tonight even though out series is over. They are continuing with music and offered me some money to come and play hostess to it, so I said okay. I sure had a spike in blood pressure while thinking about it, but talked to Mark and that helped. I don't know why decisions and problem solving are getting so difficult for me! I am reluctant to do this hosting because it takes away my Wednesdays again (but maybe for only a few more weeks) and means I'm working for "him" in a way and I prefer things that just come on my paycheck and I know I'll be paid for them (unlike the Kershaw debacle). Plus, the inlaws are coming in a few weeks and that cuts me out of entertaining them that night at Mark's gig. But, it is money. Good money. Money that I certainly wouldn't let Mark turn down if he had an opportunity to make it, so I have to take it too.

I learned more about our station anniversary plans for next week and that put me into a tizzy yesterday. I suppose I need to find board ops for it. I don't want this job!!! But it has only been two weeks, that's what I'm telling myself.

I need to get up and do something. I'm going to go to lunch in a minute with my friend that used to work with us. I am not much for socializing, but she's called me several times and I should do that.

Oh my gawd.... the morning team just let "shit" out on the air. Not good. Of course, if Cotton was still there he'd be having a heart attack.