Estoy Nueces

Where have I been the last couple of weeks? No idea. Just working and poking along. It has been too hot to step foot outdoors. Not really, but still very hot for this time of year. It is fall now and SOME cooler (read: normal) temperatures should start on Monday, but it isn't going to be fall-like for a couple more weeks, it seems.

I'm just messing around wishing I had direction right now. My heart is breaking for my poor sister and how she never gets to babysit her grandchildren. They were going to go see the kids play soccer, but the games were canceled. They asked if they could just come over to see the family, but their son, my nephew, said no it was a bad time because the wife's aunt from Indiana is in town. Well..... we all know the aunt well, love her company, she's been at my sister's house for holidays. Why couldn't they invite them over and include them? It is just sad.

I see there is a pretty good football game on this afternoon with Texas and Tech so I may go see Mom and take cookies or something? I guess I'd better check to see if it is even televised.

I am amused at how much money my sister spends on organizers and people to help clean her house, but I guess that is what I need to get off my ass to do it. My house is not a "wreck" but there is a lot of stuff still out of place and I want everything to be much more spare and clean. My desk(s) are piled high everywhere.

I keep trying to think of what I WANTED in my life when I divorced. Just my sweet little house and genealogy and garden and occasional outing with friends. All of that is really what I have, why can't I relax into it? Or do I already relax into it too much?

I still have so many dreams about my ex-husband. He's usually kind of a dick in them, though, which is good. He is usually texted with his girlfriend or leaving to go see her or she's even right there. I do hold on to the good memories when I'm awake, but I'm glad my subconscious reminds me of the sucky parts so I don't get too sentimental.

So..... I am going to put on a podcast right now and clean up a couple little corners RIGHT HERE around this desk just to feel like I've started on this day. We'll see how far I get after that.