"Sunshine" by Jonathan Edwards playing on my radio station. That song was out when my leg was in a cast in 7th grade. The line "don't feel much like dancing" reflected my thinking. I think that song is on a list a friend sent me last week. He has kept a list of his favorite three pop songs of the week since he was a kid. He has added and added and now has a list of 890 favorite songs, in order. It is 890 because that was the AM frequency of WLS in Chicago. He sent me the PRINTED list. It's huge! Lots of the songs he loved were not hits and many are forgotten hits or songs I just missed somehow. They came out in the days where every radio station in the country DIDN'T play the same songs each week. It is fascinating to go through his list. I made a Spotify playlist of the first 50 so I could listen to them without looking them up. It's fun to have the surprise of an unfamiliar or barely familiar song pop up. I want to do the next 50 soon.

Okay, I lied, I did start with boring stuff.

I have a full free weekend ahead of me and I hope I feel some sense of satisfaction when it is done. I try to --everyday -- think "What would make me the happiest at the end of the day that I got done?" (forgive that poor sentence structure). A clean house ALWAYS makes me incredibly happy. I hope that's in there. But I also want to work on this genealogy project I've had open on my computer screen all week. Every day I get up and see all these open windows from it and think, "Oh, I didn't do anything with that yesterday. Today. Today I'll get busy."

I guess I should make note of the MONUMENTAL national news that happened this week so I'll know where we were in history when I read this again. The former president DJT was indicted on a shitload of charges! Serious charges, like espionage. Wow. He actually has to set foot in a courtroom on Tuesday and that will probably be a circus. No telling what this next year will bring.

I just finished a fascinating book by Gore Vidal, written in the 1950s called "Messiah." It could do with some rewriting and improvement (ha, me improving on Vidal), but it has so many parallels with Trumpism it is prescient. It's about a movement that arises that isn't a religion, yet the people "worship" this leader and believe everything he says, etc. The government investigates him, religions fight against him (THAT hasn't happened, but dang well should have), and then eventually the churches are destroyed in his name the government is filled with so many of his followers, everyone has to fall in line or be massacred. I'm sure there are other books with the same ideas. What was that one where the sniper tries to kill a candidate that is extreme?

I have had to clear my throat and cough a little all week long. I think it is the smoke from Canada. It is supposed to be gone by now, but Dallas has pollution all the time so it is likely still causing me issues. More reason not to work outside. I did call my noncommunicative drainage guy. He does have a plan where he can use his company's pipes and workers so I can get a better deal (he says) but he has to wait until his crews are not otherwise occupied. I do hope it happened soon. I tried to dig in the yard yesterday but clay is just awful. I miss good DIRT from our farm. You could dig a whole without scraping off your shovel after each scoop. We have had some rain this week and we may have some storms tonight. We'll see. I do know it is incredibly hot and we've got a long four months ahead of us.

I tried to get out of the house and be friendly Thursday night. A Facebook group of women in my town were talking about playing trivia at a local brewery. I went to join them, but it was incredibly crowded. I had no idea that place drew so many people on a Thursday night. I couldn't find the two women I was looking for and I felt awkward and old and out of place so I drank my beer and left.

I've heard from my old ghosting friend today. She sent a friendly message on Facebook and says she and a friend might be up this way sometime. Interesting. I really would like to have our friendship back, but I feel like I have tried and gotten no response. It would have been so nice to move up here and to have had her to email and call frequently.

Speaking of friends. My oldest college friend has been sick and I'm not sure what it up. She missed Mother's funeral because she had a doctor's appointment that had been hard to get so she couldn't skip it. That was two months ago and she's continued to see a lot of doctors and now she's had a heart attack and gone to the hospital by ambulance and spent the night there last night. Beth and I talked on the phone trying to make a timeline and figure out what is going on and what "caused" this. We aren't sure when it began or what the first symptoms were. I hope it isn't serious, of course. She's MY age. A spring chicken.

I am continuing to bore myself as I sit here and I know I am procrastinating on this project. I likely will go put in a load of towels in the washer, add to the dishwasher, maybe start a quiche for lunch, get a big glass or water, etc., before I settle into writing. I love to write! Why am I dragging my feet? Perfection, most likely. Insecurity about having ALL the details. Insecurity about making assumptions about something that happened 170 years ago. Worries about what others think of me. "Who does she think SHE is?" Augh. I hate this feeling.