Estoy Nueces

We are back and recovering from a hard week. It got even harder than the two funerals we were at. While I was up there in Dallas I heard that the production manager for the station died with cancer on Wednesday. He had waged an all out war against it when diagnosed 3 or 4 years ago and overcame it, but it came back and got him this time. I would be more heartbroken and sad if I had liked the guy more. I try not to be hypocritical and talk about how wonderful he was, when I didn't think that he was. When my friend Ellie was here the other night I asked her about him. She agreed that he had become much more likable and nice since he got sick. And he also seems to have gotten religion since he got sick, and I am glad for that. I think that was why he was so miserable and hateful in the past. But he passed away and since many of my friends were very close to him, I feel very sorry for them. But then Friday I talked to M&M and she mentioned a benefit coming up for some guy. When she described him I realized it was my friend Billy who I like to flirt with, though I haven't seen him in months and months. He got prostate cancer and didn't know it and didn't treat it and never goes to the doctor because I'm sure he is uninsured...and now he has Stage 4 brain cancer and is going into hospice care. He is younger than me and vivacious and fun. I am incredibly sad about that.

The funerals were very sweet. I drove to Dallas Monday and went straight to my sister's...well, after a visit to a haircutter for a quick cut. She cooked dinner for the three of us (that house sure is big without the boys) and we watched football. When I went up to bed I checked my email and I had a transcription to do. Since I was still awake and it was there, I did it, though it is incredibly hard on the Mac without the footpedal software and without all my built in shortcuts. I got it done and sent.

Tuesday we were up early and Mom came over and we drove straight up to Oklahoma. It was very foggy and rainy and got colder and colder as we went. I was shocked when the temperatures at noon were lower than any low we've had in Austin all summer. The rain stopped once we got there, thank goodness. There was lots of family and food at the church. That fellowship hall seemed a lot smaller than it did when Pappa died and his service was there. It was very special and sad to see my mother and three aunts gathered around a table talking. All widows now. I wanted to take a picture, but I don't believe in pictures at funerals so I refrained. My genealogy cousin came, too, and we got a good visit. All of my first cousins except one were there. And the husband of the one that died in December was there, too.

The music for the service was perfect and my sister sang and did a beautiful job on "my" song---a song my aunt arranged and I sang at church in high school, "What a Day that Will Be" and "Until Then." A mash-up, I guess, we just didn't call them that back then (ha, or now). My cousin preached his father's service and that was very hard on him. It was very sweet and moving, talking about the relationship with him and his sons and his farm and animals and God.

Afterward, we went to the muddy cemetery and he was buried by his brothers and daughter-in-law and many others.

We didn't stay after that and headed straight back to Dallas. We ate dinner in Wichita Falls and it was still cold and rainy. We got back to Dallas about 8:30 and I packed up and headed on over to Mark's mother's house. He had been delayed with a blowout on his trip up that afternoon, but he was there. His brother was there before long, too.

The service on Wednesday for his stepdad was very sweet and moving, too. It was in "our" church, the one we married at. It is not in as good of shape as it was then, when it was a "real" active church. Now it has just been sitting there for a while and needs a paint job and the interior is quite bare. The organ is gone and the kneeling pads. But the service was beautiful and they had the most gorgeous arrangement of stargazer lilies and roses and orchids. Their fey funeral director, who does a wonderful job, but it also a little over the top, read the obituary, or "said" it because he knew them all so well. Then their preacher from their other church did a service that was very nice, all about him and not about fire and brimstone. Then others spoke a bit, his sons and some others. I was so glad Mark stood up and cried and thanked their family for making us a part of their family and he said that Les was the finest man he had ever known. It was very sweet.

Then the pall bearers actually carried that huge heavy coffin to the cemetery. That is certainly something you don't see anymore and it was the considered opinion of the men that they don't want to do it anymore. Too heavy and too awkward, plus someone put the short guys in front. They made it and there was a sweet service at the graveside, too, with a letter from his niece read.

At that point we all went back to the place where we had our reception (it seemed much smaller, too) and had a lunch. Then we all went BACK to the grave for pictures. No, I don't believe in pictures at a funeral, but apparently the funeral director did and took many group shots. I don't think Mark's mother looked her best in her sadness, but everyone else was dressed up and fine, I guess. It will be the one and only picture ever made of our two families together, that is for sure. I was a little unhappy that Mark and his brother were never mentioned as survivors or mentioned, period. They were pallbearers so they were listed that way, but with no context of how they were related.

After the service we went back to the house, but no one else except "our" family. We all crawled off and took naps. Later we went over to the neighbors and visited and saw his remodeling and had a drink. He is a nice guy, but I didn't like his fiance much, but that could have been because I've heard about their previous breakups. Not my worry.

We ate food the church sent over and visited and watched some TV, I suppose, I really don't remember the evening. Thursday we had great pizza from Mark's favorite pizza place in the world. We took her Cadillac to the oil change place because it was leaking oil and they advised her to sell it because it is unfixable (and it is old). Mark had said we would leave after lunch, but I think he was reluctant to go. He started in on cleaning her workbench. I washed and changed our sheets and cleaned the bathroom in case she has more company. I took some liquor (that she offered) from the cabinet that will soon not contain any liquor and will be just for her stuff again. She had that "sweep clean" attitude that mother had, too, and I think that is good. Upstairs, where we slept in Mark's old room, was like a walk-in closet for Les. A HUGE room, but completely packed with clothes, not just in the closets, but on racks out in the room and portable dressers and shoe shelves. I counted 90 pairs of shoes and boots that were visible---- not even getting into the closet to see what was in there beyond what I could see through the door. NINETY! And literally 100s of ties, shirts, etc. Many many suits and pants and jackets. And the garage had hats and jackets and shoes. And his little casita had racks of clothes, too. Unreal how much he owned. Of course, she is not like my mom with that "send it to goodwill" attitude. She is trying to find someone that has size 13 feet that would benefit from these shoes. We'll let her take her time on that, I suppose.

The afternoon wore on and Mark wanted to take a nap, but I insisted we needed to go on and visit the family friends that he wanted to visit. So we went there and visited and then their son came over and then Mark's brother came over. I could see time getting away from me, but I knew Mark was enjoying this tremendously and it would be hard for him to leave. Fortunately, I had my car so I finally left him behind. I got home about midnight and then had to type two reports for the doctors.

We hurried home when we did because I had that work to do and Mark had a doctor's appointment, but we were also hearing that Austin would be inundated with rain and wind and we wanted to get things prepared for hurricane Ike that was hitting the coast. As usual, the chance of rain went down and down and we had some windiness yesterday and finally a little bit of rain late last night, but mostly nothing at all. The coast, however, is in terrible shape, as is Houston, and I am worried about those folks and how they will recover. Austin is full of refugees again.

I've been watching lots of politics and don't think I've mentioned that Sarah Palin is McCain's pick for VP. I admire what the woman has done, but I don't like her and I don't like their politics and I hope more than ever that the next president is Barack Obama. It is very close and interesting. Saturday Night Live did a great send up of Palin last night as their opener, but that was about the only funny, novel thing of the whole show. Boring season opener.

Today is bright and sunny and I should get out and go for a walk. There is also football to watch, but no Dallas or Houston, so what is the point. I have lots of findagrave stuff I want to accomplish and some more genealogy projects. I need to get started and dig in and not let this day get away from me.