Thursday, Mar. 10, 2005 11:39 pm

More questions

Mark is working extra late tonight. It isn't even SXSW and he's swamped. I expect I won't see much of him until the 25th or so.

I have had some revelations in my head about why my voice doesn't work. I wish by having the revelation I would also have my voice back, but that hasn't happened. But with the visit to the hypotist yesterday and discussion with my group this morning, I remember a lot of shutting down going on when I was a kid in Colorado. It was a very hard transition and change that I never really adapted to and especially quit speaking as freely as I had done before when I had people making fun of my accent. Not just the kids either, the teachers did, too. It made me clam up, a lot. Even when we moved back to Texas, I had problems. Then all the Texans thought I had a Colorado accent. So why did I choose radio where my voice is on display all the time? I think because I was only speaking and not have to hear people reply, for one thing. Maybe it was a defiance, too, that I COULD speak. So why don't I use that defiance more with my written word, too (where there IS no accent?). I don't know answers, just lots more questions.

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