1999-12-10 11:05:30

Thoughts on diaries

I wonder why it is, when I am at work and have work to do but the computer and the internet are sitting there, beckoning to me, mocking me, that I can find a million web sites that are fascinating to look and to read. When I'm here at home, fresh cup of coffee in hand, husband out of the house and a full hour before my "must see TV" (the noon news on CNN) comes on, I'm stumped. Nothing to look at, nowhere to go. Maybe it is because the connection at work is so fast and I can zip through links like a blowtorch through flesh.

It is Friday but feels like it should be the weekend to me. Big disadvantage of recording radio shows in advance is that I get in the weekend frame of mind on Thursday. Today I'll be recording shows for Monday and I'll be tired and have the Monday blahs, just in time for the "real world" weekend.

I had the most amazing experience yesterday

I really didn't, I just wanted to see what it felt like to say something like that. Can't recall when I've had an amazing experience lately.

Got a new magazine in the mail yesterday. It is called Texas Music and it has "my" Lyle Lovett on the cover. They are online at texasmusiconline.com if you want to check them out. This is their premier issue and it is well written, not pandering, and is laid out quite nicely. I think that is where so many music promoting Texas music has gone wrong: They look cheap and like a fanzine and don't have much more content than a fan raving over their favorite's latest gig.

Subject for a future entry: My love of Texas music and its birth and development, featuring Ernest Tubb, Willie Nelson and Asleep at the Wheel, beginning in the early 1960s and exloding wildly in the late 1970s at the Red Headed Stranger emerged and Joe Ely, Ray Wylie Hubbard, Steve Fromholz, Marcia Ball, et al, took over my brain, going into a deep pop radio induced sleep for a much-too-long period in the eighties only to re-emerge, unscathed as the nineties, and love, blossomed.

Tonight I become a babysitter again. I can't remember the last time I babysat for someone that wasn't related by blood. Even then, I haven't sat with a BABY in 9 years! As the sweet child's mother reads this, I hope she isn't having second thoughts. The baby in question, lets call him Sam, is 14 months old almost and the most personable, bright-eyed, happy little wonder boy I've seen since my own precious nephews were that age. It will be fun to play "pee-bye" (no that has nothing to do with bodily functions) and "pig nose" with him. I've only been with him with his parents before so I hope he will be happy when it is just the two of us.

I am enjoying this journal writing far more than I expected to. The only drawback is that I am writing to entertain and enlighten instead of writing for myself at some points. Maybe that isn't a drawback. I was reading some of the other Diaryland entries and the whine, whine, whine tone of them makes it easy to move on. Then again, if I need to whine, whine, whine, this is a good place to do it. Or maybe I should start another, completely unpublicized diary to whine, whine, whine, in. I enjoy reading some of what their writers call whining (as in Anhedonia) and I don't see it as whining since it is still entertaining and relateable.

I also find myself reading the other journals and be amazed at how the author seems to find just the right turn of phrase or word that exactly expresses what they wanted to express. I don't think I have that organizational ability to write a cohesive entry AND use them good words. Then again, it is overanalysis. Poor Pamie wrote that she knew she could never write the side-splitting comedy she was watching on TV. Of course she can. It is just that she doesn't get the "surprise" factor that someone else's comedy gives you. I suppose it is the same with my writing. You don't know all the other thoughts and ideas and words crowding through my brain so you don't know if I could "do any better." You read what you read and accept it as that.

Reading the diaries of teenagers online makes me: a. Glad I'm not a teenager and b. Glad there was no internet when I was a teenager. I still have diaries I wrote in eighth grade as I met and fell head over heels with Jeff. They are sweet to read and fun to feel that feeling again. But if they had been online when I was thirteen and ANYONE IN THE WORLD had read them, I would have had to throw myself in a volcano as a virgin sacrifice and there were none near Canyon, TX, so I really would have been miserable. These current diarists are leaving themselves wide open to EVERYONE reading their diaries if they even tell one best friend about the site (which they will) and, sadly, they probably won't be able to read it and see their handwriting and their emotions in ink on a piece of paper twenty or thirty years from now. I've thrown away some diaries over the years and, although they might have been volatile, I wish I could look at them again. On the other hand, maybe if I had kept some of my diaries quite hidden on the internet I wouldn't have thrown them away?

Now I've remembered I wanted to look up some sites about html and photo uploaded, etc. I will go surf in my remaining 39 minutes before Lou and Natalie give me my daily dose of news and human companionship.

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Book Club - Tuesday, Jan. 28, 2014
A Good Saturday Ahead - Saturday, Jan. 18, 2014
Back to Work - Monday, Jan. 06, 2014
The New Year Arrives - Wednesday, Jan. 01, 2014
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